Wednesday, January 7, 2009

$34.99 might not be worth it

So in my quest to rid myself of 8 months worth of Montana-style drinking, I've joined a gym. I usually try to find the nice gym in town so it makes me want to go. Now that I have to watch my money, spending $125 a month on a "club" vs a "gym" didn't seem like the smartest decision.

So I joined Bally's. I have always avoided the Bally's/24 Hour Fitness/Golds Gym's of the world because they just seem so sleazy. And the men are always too muscular and tan with cropped hair and bicep tattoos. I hate the way they're always going to refill their water/protein powder/steroid conconctions and then taking 20 minute breaks between sets. And the women all have fake boobs and wear really tight pants and don't put their hair up in a ponytail. Who wants sweaty hair? And a sweaty back?

And then there's the smell. You know what I'm talking about. Like a mix between Wal-Mart and a rollerskating rink. If both of those were packed with sweaty people.

The gym I joined has a normal sleazy section and then it also has a "women's only" section. I was fascinated. All the same machines and weights, but no men. And since the tan, boobied women tend to stay on the sleazy side to attract the sleaveless shirted, no-neck men, the "women's only" side is full of slighty overweight to full-on obese older women.

So I'm torn here... which side do I go to?? Do I stay on the women's only side until I save up enough money for a boob job? Or do I brave the judgemental d-bags on the sleazy side in order to save myself the shame of being one of the "older crowd?"

Decisions, decisions... Meh, I'll probably just stop going to the gym.

11 comments:

Greg said...

Good call. That smell starts to stick to you if you go there often enough.

Andrea said...

Maybe stay on the women's only side until you start feeling more confident in yourself and then move to other side. Those fake boobied women have nothing on you! I don't get the girls who don't put their hair in a ponytail. What is wrong with them? It's so disgusting.

Anonymous said...

Haha, my solution would be just to stop going to the gym too. It's the easiest choice really.

Good luck either way though!

Anonymous said...

I like to stick in the women's section just because my baggy tshirt that I "borrowed" from my ex boyfriend isn't the hottest thing in the world and I don't like to be watched when I'm working out. However, if everyone on the womens side looks like Barbie then I would be torn. I say try both and see where you feel more confortable! Good Luck!!!

Anonymous said...

I go to the sleeze side b.c the other side is lonely. But that's just me ;)

Mostly though, the only men who talk to me on my side are retirement age, so it really doesn't seem that bad...

Kath! said...

I would stay on the women's side because the ladie's there probably will be nicer and not laugh at you when you drop your iPod on the treadmill, get it tangled on your shoe and fall down, getting your body dragged to the floor and laying there. At least, that's my personal opinion. Yes, it's happened.

Shauna Summers said...

You could always come join my community rec center. It's like an exclusive club because all the machines are clean and there is no wait (because no one is ever there), but at a fraction of the price. $17 per month. And you get me to keep you company. Just saying...

Year of Yes! said...

Well...it could be worse.You could be like D and I and have all your exes/ summer hook ups there..we have no girls side..I say it depends on the day..some days you go to the gym feeling good a little hot..go sleazy..other days its all about the strenth of being around the ladies!

Emily said...

Lizzie! I am still drying my tears of laughter! I just dedicated my whole last week to finding a gym that wouldn't feel like a sleazy one. Needless to say, I am still on the hunt.

My solution(and you can join me if you would like): lipo, and a boob job...Everybody wins!

Hope you are well in P-town. If it makes you feel any better you could be stuck in Eugene like me. Think about it...

EP said...

Oh, goodness. If I were in your shoes, I would stay on the women's side. If there's anything I hate, it's when someone watches me work out (or do anything that I generally don't like to do/aren't good at.)

Or maybe just splurge for that boob job. ;) I kid, I kid.

JUST ME said...

Those women who exercise with their hair down...seriously, what the fuck.

That is such a dumb decision.

How about the ones who wear the SHORT SHORTS. So short I feel like gross old man for staring but I can't help it because they are SO SHORT.